One of my guy friends recently asked me why he and I don’t date each other. I thought back to the last time I hung out with him, which turned into a particularly uninhibited night, starting out with us eating chocolate-covered strawberries and dancing to the piano bar at Mastro’s and ended at a strip club until 3 a.m. Although the night was ridiculously fun, I seriously had no business “making it rain” when I had a 9 a.m. clients the next morning. Despite the fact that my friend is handsome, fun, and I enjoy his company very much, I explained that I felt he was too wild for me, and that I need to be with someone who keeps me grounded.
It’s no secret that I possess a bit of a wild streak myself. Whenever I’ve tried to date someone who was even wilder than I am, I would get myself into trouble trying to keep up with him. I believe there should be one partner who stabilizes the other, and I can speak from experience that relationships tend to work best for me when I’m the wilder one. To put things in perspective, my longest relationship was a man who did crossword puzzles every night. He once came home from work with a bottle of Dom Perignon. I said, “Let’s party!” He responded, “Let’s have a reading party!” Who in the world reads when they drink champagne? Give me a bottle of Dom and there are a lot of things I might be tempted to do; reading, however, isn’t one of them.
My parents also have this kind of dynamic where my dad is so serious I can literally count the times I’ve seen him smile on both of my hands, and my mom is more light-hearted and fun, not to mention a total social butterfly. He does keep her safe, but to be honest, my dad will never be wild.
Last summer while I was visiting my family in Chicago, my niece, who was six-years-old at the time, saw a picture in my phone of a guy I had gone out with on a few dates. This guy was a lot of fun but liked to drink and party a little too much to be boyfriend material. My wise-beyond-her-years niece took one look at his picture and said, “I don’t like him…I like serious men like Cole. He’s six, and I can tell he loves me.” Cole must be pretty special if he’s already considered a man at the age of six. Apparently my niece and I have similar taste. I, too, like serious men whom I can tell love me.
I’m a girl who, for the most part, has my head in the clouds. I feel I need a man who has his feet planted firmly on the ground to balance out my whimsical nature and keep me on planet Earth. If I’m the more practical or responsible one in the relationship, we’re going to be in for trouble. So, as much as I adore my friend, what I’m looking for is someone who keeps me safe–so I don’t get too wild♥